Thursday, November 18, 2010

Dear Mike...

Ignoring your last advice, I have in fact, shamed my country. Or perhaps my county-- which is smaller and more manageable to shame.

Here's a list:

1. Town
2. County
3. State
4. Region
5. Country
6. Continent
7. Hemisphere

Here are ingredients to apply to the corresponding numbers:

1. Eggs
2. Hair
3. Leaves
4. A hill
5. Rusted pipes
6. An egret
7. Yarn or twine

Alternatively, the following list can combine with the aforementioned itinerary to essentially burn a few calories:

1. Pooping accident
2. Parachute sideways
3. Having a bee in the bonnet
4. Mowing a yawn
5. Breaking LP's in half
6. Yelling at a tree
7. Gagging sounds every third blink

The next items have little to do with anything except make liars out of us all:

1. Knotting pant legs together
2. Candles on top of a milkshake
3. Reading bibles or magazines
4. Writing every tenth second
5. Hesitating to ask
6. Playing dodgeball with onions
7. Eating birdseed with yogurt

Last, this list acts as another corresponding addendum. Don't misread!

1. Soaping up
2. Letting the oil sit
3. Lingering in amazement
4. Fighting with feathers
5. Tables in a river
6. Bending you over
7. Answering every fourth minute

(~<•>~)




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